It’s hard enough to find out you’re unexpectedly pregnant, but it can seem even harder when faced with something else…How to tell my family I’m pregnant, and should I?
That question can bring back the shakiness and panic that hit when you first saw the results on your home pregnancy test. It might even be worse, depending on how you think they’ll respond to the news, and most women don’t expect it to go well.
Before you jump right in and blurt out, “I’m pregnant,” there are some things you should think about first.
Which Path to Take
There are options for you to consider as you look ahead to the future. Which option do you think is best for you—abortion, adoption or parenting? If you are unsure, that’s ok. At Willowbrook Women’s Center, we know this isn’t an easy choice to make.
Come in to see us and talk over your situation. We are here to support you and will go over all the information with you, make sure we answer your questions, and help you make a confident decision. This way, when your family asks questions, you will have answers ready, and be able to give them the reasons behind them.
Before You Talk to Them
Once you have decided what path to take, there are some things you should think about before talking to your family.
Where do you want to tell them? At home, at some other place? If at home, is there a particular room where you would feel most comfortable? If somewhere else, will you be able to make sure there is privacy?
What time of day would be best? It’s usually not a good idea to have this type of conversation, and then a short time later, say you have to leave. This is also a conversation best avoided right before bed when everyone is tired and cranky.
Do you want your partner there when you tell them? If he wants you to make a different choice than you have, will that make it harder if he is there? Would it be better if you had him come over after you tell them? Or, do you want someone else there with you?
Another option could be writing them a letter sharing your news and telling them you would like to talk to them afterward, perhaps setting the time out far enough that they can think things over and calm down before you return.
Prepare for Their Reactions
Before you talk with your family, consider their feelings and how they will react. They might be angry, frightened for you, shaky, stunned, silent, sad, or generally freak out, spitting out questions faster than you can answer them. They might feel they have failed you in some way, and guilt can be displayed in a variety of ways, from tears to yelling.
On the other hand, they may be excited for you or they might disagree with the path you’ve chosen.
Get the Conversation Started
When you have this kind of news, it’s best to say it upfront, but there are different ways you can tell your family you are pregnant. No matter what, do your best to stay calm.
You might start with, “I need to tell you something, but I’m afraid you’ll be upset/angry/disappointed…with/in me.” Or, “I have something to tell you. I’m pregnant.” You might start asking for support, by saying, “I’m pregnant and I really need your support.”
No matter what path you choose or how you get the conversation started, Willowbrook Women’s Center is here for you. We are glad to be able to offer you a no-cost pregnancy test to confirm your at-home test results, an ultrasound to confirm the viability of the pregnancy, and answers to all your questions. Make an appointment today.